


uh huh, honey

by wildhoneypot



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: 2d stutters a lot, Coming Out, Dialogue Heavy, Flashbacks, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Trans Character, ask to tag??, headcanons, nb russel, not good at summaries, phase 4??, pronoun switch, slur warning, trans 2d
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 01:48:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12002391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wildhoneypot/pseuds/wildhoneypot
Summary: 2d wants to talk with Russel about something.





	uh huh, honey

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"  
"Sure..?"  
2D motioned Russel to "come here" and tried to move the curtain out of the way.  
“Oh, this is serious.” Russel shuffled through the beads as 2D twirled a piece of hair and nodded.

Russel never got the chance to even see 2D's new bedroom. He didn't think it would be so small, it could hardly be called a room. 2D patted the empty spot on the bed.

  
"Did something happen?" he asked as he sat down.  
"Uh, kinda. Just.. kinda..”  
No eye contact.  
"What?"  
"I-I don't know, I don't know how to put it. I don't know how to- ugh.”  
“You can say it. I'm here, aren't I?”  
"Okay. I fink, um.." 2D paused again.  
"Take your time."  
She snapped her fingers.  
"I fink I'm a lesbian!" she grinned, finally figuring out how to tell him.

  
Russel furrowed his brows. He honestly had no idea what 2D wanted to talk to him about. But, this came out of nowhere. He knew how 2D Kind of just.. said things. So here was something new to decode.

  
“D, most of the time, men are gay. _Women_ are-” Russel eyes widened as he tried to finish his sentence.  
“Oh. You're a chick.” he said it like he solved a riddle.  
"Yeah, kinda." her smile fell with her head.  
"Well, alright."

  
They were both looking down now. Russel's eyes shifted around, even though there wasn't much to look at. 'How do you even fit in here?' he asked her in his head. He tried to read her scrawling all over the walls, but the cracks underneath obscured the chicken scratch. The picture of Liberace looking so lonely that it was about to fall down and shatter. 'You're worrying me’, he really wanted to tell her out loud. Not that he could say much, they've both taken to isolating themselves lately. Again. Whatever she could salvage from each move stacked in the corner. One of the keyboards in a chair since there's no stand.

  
"I'm sorry.."  
"For what? I get it, I don't really play with this shit either. It's suffocating. The concept of it all, what it's become, doesn't make any sense to me."  
"Yeah, you told me. That's why I wanted to tell you. I trust you."  
She was twirling her hair again, this time starting at the root. "I-I remember when you let me know and my heart started racing. When you.. when you told me about like- you're neither. You-”  
She shook her hand around trying to find the right word. A strand of hair stuck under her nail flew around with it.  
“You reject it! Fuck it! I love that!”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah! I was like-" she put her hand to her mouth and exaggerated a gasp, trying to mock her own voice. "That's so cool! Russel gets it! Of course Russel gets it!"  
Russel smirked.  
“I guess I should ask. What should I call you?”  
"Call me?" 2D cocked her head.  
"Well, sometimes we call you 'Stuart". And I know you've been tired of 2D-"  
"I don't mind."  
"Yes you do."  
Hair pulling.  
“‘D, talk to me-“  
“Honey.." she mumbled.  
"Hm?”  
“That's my name. It’s Honey.”  
“That's adorable.” Russel laughed.  
2D let out a “I don't know how to respond”- kind of half giggle. She didn't expect that reaction at all to her name.  
“How’d you choose that?”  
“School, I was a faggot. I didn’t really pick it.”  
Russel sucked his teeth, that word stung. “2D-”  
“No no no, like, I was  _The Faggot_. There were boys that liked boys but, I was the faggot, I did everyfing. Like, I did the makeup and everyfing. Well, more than the other boys. And I know.. you’ve seen me in it a lot forever-“ she waved her hands around her eyes, trying to describe the blue kohl she’s worn since they’ve met.  
“..but l-like I would wear like.. lipstick. And earrings, and whatever I could get away with."  
"Me too." Russel pulled down his ear to show off the hole.  
Honey smiled at him. "I told you I trusted you." She pulled down her ears to show the three holes in one, two in another since one closed up.  
“Punk fucking rock.” he said.  
2D stuck out her tongue.  
“I-I didn't get beat up for it but- I was still really, you know.” she flipped her wrists over. “You know?”  
“Mhmm.” Russel took her hand so she wouldn’t pull at her hair.  
“I wore lipstick, I did everyfing, I-, uhm.. Oh! Let me show you this.”

  
Russel flinched when she dropped to her knees almost too hard. She dug under her bed and after some rustling and growling pulled out a box that was already open. Full of pictures, a pair of 3D glasses hanging out, but mostly pictures. Pictures on pictures, pictures all cut up. After pulling through a little Noodle grinning after getting her ears pierced, what was probably Murdoc’s nipple, Paula's mouth, a frayed baby with a harelip staring at the camera that could have been 2D but Russel wasn’t sure, the wobble street flat, her dog in the snow a few days before he got ran over, a picture that should have been Del but he didn't show up, a flag he couldn't remember for which country, and her parents hands clasped together, she found her secondary school picture. Hair over racoon eyes, pre-hyphema. Cigarrette hanging out of each kid’s mouth.

  
“‘D- eh Honey, I've seen this before.”  
She put one finger up and held up another photo right below the one she gave Russel. The picture had been cut off for the book. Chipped nail polish. The uniform skirt over the uniform pants. An innovator.  
“Swish.” she found the word she was looking for.  
“Very.”  
“So, my nickname was Stu-Pot, right? someone said ’he’s no Stu-Pot, he’s a Honey-Pot’ and I didn’t get it but other people did. I knew they were teasing. But, I didn't care. It was cute. Like, I was taking what I could get, y’know?”

  
_“you’re beautiful, honey-pot.”_ said the upperclassman that sucked her dick once and never talked to her again.  
_“r-really? d’you mean that?”  
“shut up-“_ he said, as he unzipped her jeans.

She fiddled with the glasses, put them on and let them fall crooked over her face.  
"I fucking hated Stu-Pot it was like they were just calling me stup-!" she interrupted herself with a snort. "Oh god, look at this one."  
She found a picture of her and a blonde Paula pouting at the camera, her Robert Smith face matching Paula’s Courtney Love. Matching lipstick probably on every tooth.  
Russel heard her sigh. "Looks!" he shouted, snapping over the picture.  
"Oh my god, shut up!" she play pushed him over.  
“C’mon Honey-Pot! C’mon Hunny~!” he pushed her back.  
“Stoppit- oh my god, look at my mouth!” she threw her head back trying to hold up the picture. “I- my mou-AH! I fink this was when I was getting used to my mouth-” she stopped to breathe. “Ugh.. my mouth being fixed but I- fink I couldn't tell the difference-!” her voice kept getting higher and her words kept breaking apart. Russel put his head in his hand and laughed with her. They haven't laughed together like this in years.  
“Be nice to the baby.” he said through the giggles, touching the adolescent Honey-Pot’s mouth on the picture. She sucked her teeth and tossed it back into the box with a flick of her wrist.

It got too quiet around them. Russel noticed her sighing a little too much. They were too short and broken. She was smirking to keep her expression from completely melting. The red lens of the glasses was fogging up.

  
“Hey.”  
A hiccup to switch things up a bit.  
“Hey, what else is it?”  
She shook her head.  
“C’mon Hon, you already told me this much.”  
“It's Noodle.”  
“What’d she do?”  
“She doesn't know. I fink. I can't tell her.”  
“No?”  
“ **No.** ”

  
Her voice dropped and she looked straight at Russel. She could see the surprise in Russel’s face because he forgot her voice could go so low.

  
“Sorry.”  
“Don't be. Why can't you tell her?”  
“You kidding? I've been her big brother all her life. Or her.. little brother? Twin brother? I don't like how-she-puts-that-it's-confusing-I-mean-fuck-she-”  
Her tangent started turning into one big, long word.  
“Breathe.”

  
She clapped at herself to stop the word vomit. Really loud. She sat there with her hands together and eyes shut to reboot. Russel thought she looked like she was praying.

  
“Right, whatever. I fink you know why I can't tell her.” she opened her eyes slowly.  
“I don't ‘fink’ I do.”  
“Okay.. Have you noticed.. her ‘bad ass woman’ fing?”  
“I see her instagram D- sorry, Honey.”  
“Okay.. it's great right? But, have you noticed.. how some women into that kind of fing can be?”  
“Mm-” he sighed. “Yeah. Yeah I do.”

Honey stuck her palm out as if to say “point proven” and threw herself on her pillow.

“I mean, you get it.” she touched Russel’s shoulder and ran her hand down his arm. “And honestly, I don't care if Murdoc knows, he can figure it out. Call me a faggot again as if it's news. Stare at my ass when I run out crying.”  
“Honey-Pot.” he tried to say sympathetically but sounded more impressed at the accuracy.  
“If he can figure himself out first. Like, a-at least I admit it. Well, I'm going to I guess. But, I don't deny myself.”  
“He's not subtle, is he?”  
“Fuck no.”  
Her bluntness made Russel laugh through his nose.  
“But, I don't care about him. This is about babygirl. I can't tell her.”  
She reached to pull at her hair again and stopped herself. She wrung her hands instead. “Like.. the bad ass woman fing. I love it. But- I.. I’m not a bad ass. I don't want to be a bad ass. I-I like all the pink stuff and strawberries and I’m moody and a dumbass and wear ‘mom jeans’ whatever those are and I walk around without a shirt but not to say anyfing sometimes I just get hot and- the.. she’ll.. just think I’m making fun of women. She’ll never see me as a woman. Or whatever I am. Big-medium-small-average size brother can't suddenly want titties.”  
“Do you?”  
“Not really?” she looked down at her chest. “I- I don't know. But, I can't tell her.”  
“You don't have to be like the women she talks about.”  
“I’d be an imposter. I can't tell her.” her voice started breaking.  
“D-”  
“Russ! ‘The Future Is Female’! To her, I’m male! I know that doesn't matter- but.. a lot of people think.. the women- I couldn't- I can't tell her!”

  
She heaved for a little bit, and trapped it back in with a deep breath. She caught a tear with her tongue.

  
“I'm sorry. This- this is stupid. I know this is stupid.” she croaked. “I- I’m not asking for advice or you to fix it or nofing, I promise. I- ah.. hm.”  
“I don't know what to say, D. I can tell you been thinking about this a lot. This shit was hard for me, too. Still is. Guess that's why we don't bring it up.”  
“Yeah.” she hiccuped.  
“Shit, I keep calling you ‘D’.”  
2D waved her hand.  
“Nah, you told me what you wanted to be called and-”  
“D’s cute too. Even Stu is kind of cute. I really really really don't care. Just don't call me Stuart. Or Stu-Pot. Or Faceache. Or Harold, I don't even know where that came from.”  
“I see, you just wanna be cute, huh.”  
“Stoppit.”  
“A girl named Stu.”  
2D snorted.  
“I’m a woman. I’m 39.”  
“Excuse the fuck out of me.”  
“Yeah that's right.”  
“Okay, Honey-Dee the Second. What you just did to me, that's what you should do with Noodle."

  
2D raised her eyebrows. Russel noticed her eyelids lift and guessed that was an eye roll.

  
“I know that's easier said than done. We're all bull-headed and she picked that up. But, if you ever get to that point with her.. just.. let her know what's up. You know what I mean? She may not get it but.. you just gotta..”

Russel was starting to lose his point. He started remembering this wasn't a breeze for him either. As of now, he's only been able to really talk about this with two people. And it took a while for Del to understand. Honey was probably the first person to react.. well. Most people didn't, and don't, know what to make of him. People would pretend to be indifferent,say he was “interesting” or “brave” or “creative”, but he knew what they really thought. What they really meant. So he’s been hiding, too.

  
“All you can do is let her know how it is, there's nothing she can do about it. She's just gonna have to learn. That also goes for the old goth.. or the press.. or, oh damn.”  
“What's wrong?”  
“Nothing. Just.. I see why you're nervous. It’s hard, D.”

  
2D put her head on Russel's shoulder with a sigh, Russel rested his head on hers. They sat in silence, again, watched it get dark around them. They each took turns trying to get out a thought ‘I-’, ‘What about-’, ‘Uh-’, and not finishing any of them. Accepting some kind of defeat they didn't want to think about too much.

  
“Russ?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Russ?” she asked again, just to be sure he was listening.  
“What, Honey?”  
“I got you, okay?”  
Russel smiled.  
“I got you, too.”  
She wrapped her arms around him. Russel mirrored her again and returned the hug.  
“Fanks for listening to me.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> i hc 2d was born with a cleft lip so that's what the little story with the photo with paula was about if that didn't make any sense, probably didn't


End file.
